I've decided to open up an IRC room for the viewers who want to come and talk to the WTFMen and other viewers in real time. There are two catches : you have to use a registered name and you have to try not to act like a monkey fucking a football. I'm commonly known as the IRC Nazi because I don't handle stupidity very well, so if you keep the conversation sane and the spam to a minimum, you're welcome in the room.

Some quick instructions:

  1. Go get MIRC
  2. Under File-Options-Connect, add a new server Stratics with an irc server name of irc.stratics.com
  3. After you connect, type /nick [name] where [name] is what you want to be known as. Please, keep the names from being ungodly lengthy. If your nick is IReallyLikeWendysHamburgers or something just as long, I won't give you access.
  4. Register that nick by typing /nickserv register [pwd]. Remember your password, obviously. If you're not registered, you cannot be added to the access list.
  5. Identify yourself to the nick server - type /nickserv identify [pwd]
  6. Type /join #wtfman. You'll be banned, but try again in a few minutes and hopefully one of us will have added you to the access list. If not, type "/msg NH add me to #wtfman, please" and I'll add you when I see it.

After you've done all that, you should be able to get in the #wtfman room. If you want MIRC to automatically handle the nick/identify/joining, then go back to File-Options and click on the + next to IRC. Under there will be a Perform section. enable it by checking the box and add these lines :

/nick [your registered name]
/nickserv identify [pwd]
/join #wtfman

I'm in IRC all day from work and a fair amount from home, so I'll try to help everyone get in that wants in as well as moderating/answering questions.
- Nighthawk


Solution: Bomb the Boats and Feed the Fish...

I must say a few things here. After a week of reading all the usual suspects whine, bitch, complain, moan and otherwise carry on about Asheron's Call and all the horrible things that are wrong with the game and all the horrible policies that Turbine carries out, especially in regards to the playerbase, rule breakers (are they really rules?) and exploiters...I must say this to all them:

Would you shut the fuck up already?

Mu. I love his rants. He is articulate and points out serious flaws in the game and the system. He plays AC. He knows the game quite well. He is far to extremist however in his points. I don't know if Mu ranting this month somehow caused the LumBum Gang to decide that AC bashing was going to be the flavour of the week, but even little Arcadian Del Slut at Lums jumped on the AC bandwagon comparing the way Turbine does not punish bug abusers and exploiters as "the equivalent of letting bank robbers walk free with their lucre, because you'd rather invest your efforts into improving the security measures of the bank vault than putting the thieves in jail". Give me a fucking break. Let me, for my first major 153 point one shot to the head attack, enlighten your otherwise trivial brain, Arcadian, about a few "law" and "RL" things that make your idiotic and childish statements look more foolish than Leitgardis wearing her lovely Aluvian Red Cleavage Dress with Olthoi Helm.

Have you ever heard of the following things you pungent little fuck? The right to a trial? Innocent until proven guilty? The ENTIRE fucking court system and systems of justice? The fucking fact that the people, THE PEOPLE, are the ones who empower the government to provide the backbone of the law etc?

You think what OSI does to its players is fair and just? You think they give fair trial to the players they ban?

How in the fuck can you compare exploitation in a game to robbing banks in RL WITHOUT addressing the fact that in these games that DO punish people who THEY feel broke some code or law within the game with no chance of appeal or trial, with no laws in place to protect the player, to give us trial and to protect our rights, as we have in RL, to a fair trial, to be innocent until proven guilty.

Afterall, when GM Ja deleted my boat in UO with over a million gold and equal or more than 2000 of every reg, loot stacked as thick and as high as it could go from endless pking...there was not even an explanation of what he felt I did wrong. No trial certainly...but not even a "You use UOE so I delete your bootie!"

Where was my trial? Is UO going to collapse without fair laws for its citizens, as you state AC shall fall without fair punishment for its citizens?

Is mass bannings the ideal you feel Turbine should start implementing? The same style of shit that IF it happened, you would read headlines like "300 players banned on Darktide for exploiting portal bugs!" on Lum's site? Is it the lack of horrible grief of a gaming company imposing upon its playerbase that is so rampant in UO and EQ what you seek so that you have something to write about?

Now that you and your little friends have had a hayday of generalized postings and idiotic nitpicking about AC, allow me, as a player who has been in AC, loving and hating the game for over a year solid, in a manner that I would write for a 5 year old, attempt to enlighten you to a few basic concepts about Turbine and AC in general.

Turbine's policy on exploitation and bug abuse is quite simple and has been from the start. From the very first exploit known as the "Hal Bare" bug, the one where you could jump-heal and jump-cast and was exploited in pvp and pking endlessly, Turbine has adhered with more consistency than any other MMOG, that "WE DO NOT BAN EXPLOITERS, WE FIX THE EXPLOITS".

And with this in mind, an AC player should look at anything possible to do within AC as being part of the game until said effect is removed.

It is no different than pre-casting in UO. Was pre-casting a bug? Obviously. Was Arcadian Del Slut screaming about it? I don't think so. Is run-healing and Godmode in AC an exploit? Of course it is. Will Turbine fix it? They say they shall, but ya know what...I don't think Jesse is losing sleep over the fact that Patryn can cast spells at you while in full run or that Skell is almost impossible to kill when he is running away because he can heal at will with the touch of a MS macro gaming device button.

Bottomline, when it is fixed, we will not be able to do these insane things anymore. Until it is fixed, we have full permission to use these bugs. And just how is Godmode etc, going to cause the collapse of the Rome...errr...AC empire? How is not banning players going to ruin a game? We are talking about Godmode exploitation and things like that. We are not talking about me running up to the Brit Bank and screaming, "Fuck Japs! Niggas all die!" over and over. Most of the players I know are not quitting the game because the Godmode exploit exists and is going to take another month to be fixed. They either use it or they don't. If they don't use it, the will complain about it in one breath and state, "cant wait till that gets removed next month" and move on with their gaming life. They do not "quit" because of it as Arcadian seems to feel. Hell, Stargod, one of the biggest exploiters on Darktide and a genuine full blown whiner on the boards threatened to quit AC if and when they REMOVED godmode. Man maybe Turbine should think twice about even fixing exploits. However, I am sure Turbine is fairly smart about things and generally do not let players fuck them in the ass with idle little "I AM QUITING!" threats.

"Asheron's Call has the history of Ultima Online to look at and learn from, but for some reason has decided to ignore the costly lessons already learned by Origin Systems. Rome ignored the same lessons, and now tourists flock to look at it's ruins" - Arcadian Del Sol

I find it totally absurd that in one breath you claim that the lack of laws and persecution of the people will cause the fall of AC and then in the next breath you shout out about the fall of Rome. Do you even know why the empire of Rome collapsed? I do not think it was the lack of laws and justice system, government and all that. But thats my opinion and as my University History courses taught me, the Fall of Rome is one of the most debated about "cause and effect" issues from our past among historians. I'm sure it sounded good as you typed it, and yes 99% of the morons who read Lum's site certainly went, "ohhh ahhh Arcadian! So brilliant!". The other 1%, those of us with an ounce of actual intelligence who read Lum for the comic effect and not for information...had a great laugh at your expense.

Asheron's Call is a 1000 times better of a game because Turbine has looked at the History of Ultima Online and seen the errors of OSI and its policies with the playerbase. They decided that Tyranny and total dictatorship might be like umm...a bad thing.

Secondly, Delusion. Writing up a storm are we not? Level 38 with no new stuff added for you at all? Would you give me a fucking break. 75% of the new islands was designed for mid-range players. Hell, I quit playing my uber-mage because finally Turbine fixed Archery a little bit and gave some cool mid level (My archer is level 38 at time of patch as well...now 41...all because of the new island stuff for mid-range players) content. In fact, in the last patch, I can think of ONE single monster added that was over level 200. Only one. Everything on the island is in the level 50 to 100 range and is suitable for mid-range players.

I don't see Blood out of the island killing fucking Jungle Wasps (level 65 - good low level archer kill) and Tentacle Plants. Hell, unless he needed some Death Items, I doubt a player that was above level 65 would even bother with the new Chomu Sclavus either. Only level 111, why bother when the uber-player can go back to Aerlinthe and kill level 341 Coral Golems all day.

"most of your players haven't made it to the point where they can fight diamond golems. The players you're spending all of the time designing content for are a small minority, and nobody else can touch it" - Delusion

So what? What are you trying to tell us here Delusion? Because again, the lastest patch did not introduce a single fucking new uber-mon at all. If it did, can you please tell me its name? And where I might find this uber monster that your so fucking mad about?

Or maybe by content you mean the actual EVENT itself. If this is the case, I do not see your complaint simply because IMHO, the monthly event stuff is actually the gayest part of the patchs we get from AC. I am far more interested in new areas, new mons, new treasure, new lands and places to explore than I am in the fucking storyline which I could have written when I was in grade 7 and has the intricate coherency and problem solving that rivals the test to obtain your liscense in Bermuda.

If this is what your so mad about, then let me ask you this...if this months event had been designed so that level 30 players could have easily solved it, then ummm...were you planning on being that crack trooper racing every other level 70+ player who can now smoke a pound of crack and still single handed take down everything that the EVENT places in its path because Turbine wanted to give your level 38 its fair shot at solving it? Give me a fucking break. The day Turbine can create and event worthy of the horns they blared back when retail got released, is the day I give a fuck and try and solve or take part in it.

Pavlovian exercises do not fucking impress me. Clicking this level to open that door, killing this monster to get piece #1 of 3 broken key parts...god. Design an event that takes almost the entire month to solve and not because key #2 is guarded by 25 diamond golems with a good splashing of lag to make accidental deaths in large uber groups still possible and maybe then I'll jump in and give a fuck.

Until then, unlike all the powergaming event solving mofos and all the friggin retard ranters whining about bullshit they know nothing about, I'll be exploring the new monthly content and having fun with it the exact same way I did for the last prop and enjoying all the new mid-level content that according to some does not even exist.

Oh ya and I almost forgot someone.Leitgardis, would you please just shut the fuck up and go away. The shit you write is not even worth commenting on.
- Azile

Who wants to be an Everquest Guide?

Obviously this guy is hellbent on being one, if even only for a few hours while he wreaks havoc on an EQ server.

Of course if he cannot find some EQ guide interested in getting scammed out of his or her account, he will settle for a dupe bug instead.

And to think that they said pissing in the gene pool would one day come back to haunt us....rofl.
- Azile


New WTFMan

Very few gaming rant sites catch our attention to the degree that Azile has. Ron and I have had the pleasure of being online friends with him for a long while now and have even recently met him irl. That combined with the fact that he is a rant artist of the highest caliber and a fellow evil player - we have invited him to become a WTFMan.

To give a brief background on him, he was a pk in UO like the rest of the WTFMen and moved onto Asheron's Call with it's release. He runs easily the most informative news site for the AC pk server, the Darktide News Network. And of course, he rants. Which you'll soon see if you haven't already...

Anyhow, welcome him aboard.
- Nighthawk


More Democrat Bashing

Just a couple of quick links that adequately describe how stupid the Democrat voters in Florida are :

Doctored pictures to make them more accurate

They need to hand this out in Florida

Viewer sent me this - Priceless

My favorite - "Shiney objects distracted me and I voted Buchanan!!" Heh... how do those people live with themselves.

As a side note, I'd like to thank Turbine for making archers godlike. Thanks for promoting the flavor of the month character. Jackass.
- Nighthawk


A Tribe Called Rest

After finishing that movie I didn't turn my computer on much, and it wasn't because I haven't been wearing sexy lingerie. Of course, it's not exactly an odd un-occurance when I don't update the page. Some would call it laziness, but it's not exactly that. I have this ongoing problem that seems to just get worse, which is called not giving a fuck. I suppose it's pretty sad we now live in a troubled day and age that when you don't sit on your fat (or narrow in my case) ass and type shit into a computer, it's considered laziness. Of course, we also live in a day and age that you have to count ballots 5 or 6 times before you come up with a number suitable for a democrat. But Nighthawk's already covered that below.

Anyway, I finally got around to getting all of our film developed from our Toronto excursion, and there's some pretty humorous photos to be viewed by uninterested or judgemental parties. I am not sure exactly why it took me so long to get them developed, some would call that laziness, too, but for once I'd agree with them. That or the fact that waiting in 1 hour photo lines in Wal Mart means you have to hang out with a bunch of old crusty ass Wal Mart regulars a tad longer than I can stomach. And man, let me tell you, if you haven't been to a Wal Mart in awhile, there are some unique fuckin individuals there, who are either employed as greeters, or who can be witnessed extremely casually shopping for lower prices every day in one of those go-carts. Shit you've only seen or read about in Mad Magazine or Jon Carpenter films. Ever seen "The Thing?" Well, I have. I had my Fujifilm developed by it. And one thing I always find a lot of at a Wal Mart are those big ass fat ladies wearing them dirty old neon pink cotton tights. That shit completely baffles me. If I were a scientist, I'd stake out Wal Mart.

I am gonna shoot the pictures to all of the guilty parties to get their approval on which drunken stupored instances don't belong here, and I should hopefully have a write-up done on it sometime this week. Many highlights of us Americans beating the Canadians' asses at Anchorman, Nighthawk winning a ton of Joe and Azile's money betting on my mad quarter-bouncing skills, and Azash dumping beer on random college girls for good measure. Fun to be had by all.

Until then.
- Ron

Election Thoughts

One of the AC Darktide antis has a website that keeps a political map updated so the antis know the safe spots and pk hotspots. Red Manika's changed his map recently so that pks were labeled "Bush Supporters" and Gore for antis. While this is relatively unimportant to any non-Darktide player, it did get me thinking.

In the end, that comparison does make sense to me. I mean, antis and Gore supporters both whine like hell when they lose. They cannot conprehend why the people with the opposite views (pk/Bush) do what they do. Antis/Gores are generally dependant in one way or another - either on the government for handouts or on many numbers to win a fight. And of course, the fact that pk/Bush people can't help looking at them as if they're idiots.

Not only yes, but HELL YES I'm a Bush supporter and a pk. I actually use my brain to both make decisions in and out of game. I listen, think through and come up with my own analysis of an issue without having to be led to a conclusion like a horse to water.

For those of you who are mindless followers, you're right at home with antis and Gore. Best of luck - you'll need it.

FYI, if you have a problem with the above statements, well, you can blow me. Feel free to email me because it'll waste a lot of your time while it takes me 1/10th of a second to click on the "delete message" button.
- Nighthawk


Please stop

I'm glad all of you enjoyed Ron and Grey's movie, but please stop telling me you liked it, asking me questions about Flash/movie making and especially when the next part of the movie will be released. If you have questions, comments, etc - please direct them to the people involved in the creation of the movie.

Aside from Ron and Grey being nice enough to include me in the script and giving me a couple of quick peeks at the movie in progress, I had nothing to do with it. Hell, I basically have nothing to do with this site anymore.

- Nighthawk